The Fat Zone

CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP!

So, as I enter the topshop fitting rooms; I already know the deal. Benika you will probably leave with 1 out of 11 items because either, It doesn't fit right or doesn't cover your tits or doesn't suit you’re..... Yada yada yada. Millions of excuses to hide the fact that I'm too FAT for topshop, Zara and any other European shop that haven’t yet come to the realisation that I've been consuming plantain(yes, the Jamaican way) since I was 5!

So I drape out, uninspired and feeling a little shit. Let's be clear first. I'm an über confident and boisterous lady. I love engaging, inspiring and interacting with people. I actually like my body but I'm a woman focused on my personal progression, and loving your belly bulge and being content with it are two separate things. I’m a strong advocate for “if you don’t like it, CHANGE IT!”

Now, us big ladies love to scream and shout about how we don't wanna be no skinny bitch, and every man loves meat etc etc; but here I am. In this changing room, Feeling crappy. After unsuccessfully trying insanity, juicing, herbalife and pretty much any other health fad out there (if you do find any more, leave in the comment box, because I'll probably try it); I'm still a little bit on the fluffy side. I refuse to stay on this side of the fence because soon I'll be too out of breath to climb it!

Growing up, I was slim but always round in the right places until I discovered my immense addiction to sweets; and it all went pear shaped. LITERALLY! My looks kinda overshadowed this and still does to some extent, but within myself I know I can look after my health better.

Now, I won't say the media hasn't misconstrued the whole body image consciousness; because it has influenced women as a whole. However, all of the uncomfortable and self conscious habits of pulling down your top every 5 seconds or twisting your neck 110 degrees, to hide the fat just to attain a decent selfie must not be ignored.

So as we wave goodbye to our ex fat camp attendees Monique, Khole Kardash, Jennifer Hudson and Jordan Sparks, we must ask, should we be joining them?

Self-preservation is key, and I intend to treat my body like a temple and not like a waste bin. It's time for me to leave this side of the wobbly fence.

Yours sincerely

The (soon to be) ex chubby girl